I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Randomize
