I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
