He looks like a mix between a retired piano teacher and a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Alive.
So much puke
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
Sometimes I think I'm witty and funny, and then I realize it 3pm and I'm drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I just found a live peacock hanging out behind the bar. I coerced it into my car and now I have a peacock bro that lives with me.
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