forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize