It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I skipped work to stalk him.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
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