thus making me awesome and them whores
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
