It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
You stole her cigarette screaming that you were going to stop the air cancer from getting everyone.
at least i was looking out for everybody
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
Randomize
