i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
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