You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
Randomize
