It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I was all over the place but at every locale you would pop out of nowhere and hand me a huge drink and say "HAMMERED"
I am the fairy godmother of the drink.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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