I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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