i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Randomize
