i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
