He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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