I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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