cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Randomize
