I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
