is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Its about making memories worth repressing
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Randomize
