I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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