I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The spark has left our relationship. i used to make slightly inflammatory jokes at you. you would retaliate in jest. look at this. look at what is happening here.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize