it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize