just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
Randomize