i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
Randomize
