Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
porn star boner night. come get it.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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