i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Randomize
