You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
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