Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
