I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
This is classic penis vs brain.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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