Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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