It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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