Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
Randomize
