You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
Found the puke drawer
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
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