Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
