Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i would punch a child for taco bell
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
Boobs are out for the taking
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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