His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
