If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize
