I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
