Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize