the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
