I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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