don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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