So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
don't judge my taste in strippers
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Randomize
