What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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