I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
