Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
foreskin is a definite game changer
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
