I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
