So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
