You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize