I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I had to write an apology letter to my roomate for hotboxing in our bathroom. What a bitch.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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