Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
